Introspective

I've done my math, my earliest possible enlistment date for NS is probably in October. Which now cause quite abit of problems for me. IF I DO, get into a university, I might not make it for the "mainstream" intake. Which would mean further wasting my life by 6 months or so after I ORD.

Well that aside, I guess the long waiting period should give me enough time to find a NEW job, thank you very much Spin3lli for firing me just because I was on a 5-month break for IBP attachment.

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Other than that, I've been doing some thinking lately (okay, alot). Just the other night, I was invested to be a Rover Scout. And somehow, during the course of the investiture, I maganged to find myself left alone to reflect on my current thoughts and ideals, my past and my future. It's really scary, the future. Because honestly, I don't know what's going to happen. That's probably why I enjoy thinking of the worst case scenarios all the time. So if something bad really happens, I wouldn't feel the disappointment hit me.

But I made a promise to myself silently that no matter how bad something will turn out, as my own man I will press on, if not for myself, then for the people whom are important to me. For the last two weeks, I thought I fell into a hole I couldn't possibly get out of. And I thought my mind was going to eat me from within.

But it's time I grew up.