It wanders through your thoughts, it wanders through your dreams, your memories and it always ends at your most disconsolate ones. Because isn't it only human to reminisce on the past from time to time? These memories are what defines us isn't it? It enables us to reflect and to learn.
All the things you could have done. You should have done. And you imagine what your world would be like if it was any different. What if I had studied harder? What if I had chosen that job instead? What if I had really gone with true feelings instead. What if? What if? What if? In what predicament, placed you on that path you are so grounded on now.
That so- very important, initial choice. And now you begin to consider all those things that have already happened. The path ahead seems blurry now. It starts to turn cold. And then you doubt.
You doubt the choices you are going to make, even yourself. Some choices you selfishly made for yourself, most of it for the benefit of the other. If only you had listened to "I". What "I" wanted. And not listened to "Me", not for what you would think of "Me". Decisions firmly made because of the need of the time and not because of what you deserve.
As you walk on that path and look back, a shadow, your shadow which follows you, will always always remind you of what
you want, but cannot have. You are always on the verge of losing your equilibrium. Grim. But that's a small sacrifice. Because where your dark shadow follows you like a demon, it can also be a hero to you. It waits with you, always willing to remind you, remind you that it's not the friendliest or the most popular. but it is always with you. To remind you that somehow, no matter how
hopeless, there's always still a little light left shining on you.
Hope.
