Not again. (Closer to the trilogy)

I just realised that a blog is useless to me. For someone such as myself who would prefer to keep his mind to himself then rather have someone blatantly read an online (and TRACEABLE) source to my thoughts and feelings. It hits me time and time again, why do i bother adding entries time after time. Remembrance. Sure a private journal would be better if I wanted to keep the most intimate details of my life a secret. But what would it matter? If i died one day who would find my "secret" journal? And should a lucky soul find it. What would it matter to him?

Posting your life online alows you to be traced. leaving trails for people to follow. If you're proficient enough in cybersurfing. I bet you can find any godforsaken thing on the net. Even in my attempt to keep name, age, nationality etc. off the net through fake names/ age/ pseudo-identities, i still have people able to bring my name up through pages not by me. But by others who have known me. And i have come to realise, thorughout my life, no matter how i try to look distant from the rest, there are people that i have come acrossed and even if its a small way made an impact.

And still i continue my hardass look. I continue to lie, cheat, and decieve. And for what? In an attempt to throw people off my back until i need them? Tools. That's what i read once in a business magazine (found in the back of a taxi) back in Pri 5. Albeit controversial, it has a few good reads once in awhile. It was not until secondary school did i realise what it meant when sometimes, people around you are just tools to help you better in life. Hardhitting, but not neccessarily true. Mom and Dad always said, you make your own life. Not others. I stand by that statement until the day i'm forgotten.

And that brings back to why i still continue blogging. Whether i like it or not. It gives me pleasure that few years down the road, I can probably look back on this URL and read all the crap i have written to entertain myself or you readers. I admit in 90% of my posts i do not describe a large detail of my life. But as long as i can recall why i made that post. I'm happy. I can remember that i wasn't the person i try to be. Im a different person all together. It's like they say:
"How you act when you are completely alone; that is who you truly are."

I'm guessing this will be the third and Final post concerning "Why do I blog." So far there were two previous posts to this. But I feel contented. Putting this all out. My posts so far has more or less gave you readers a sneak preview to what I really am. But as always, i prefer to read about myself than to talk about myself. Want to know the real me? Blog-hop. Find out who are my friends. Who I'm close to. If you can. So be it. You know me. If you can't. Suck thumb, try to find me in another way.